Day 5

We’re back on track. To be honest, we might even be on a better track. The first two days of V1.1 have yielded some remarkably insightful comments. Take this one for example, “This is a wonderful idea. Too bad so many people have forgotten how to write. Maybe someone will prove me wrong.” But lest you think only the judgmental have grown a fondness for The Notebook, read ‘em and weep:

“It’s a beautiful day and this notebook is a beautiful idea! Enjoy all of the beautiful things in life. Don’t forget to take notice. Don’t rush! Take things slow! Love is all around yoU! God is all around you!
Peace
Elizabeth”

Even the Godly are doing it, which takes quite a bit generally. After these two comments, we were, quite frankly, asking for a brief respite from all the flattery. But our requests for sanity were merely met with international acclaim, “Great idea – what a beautiful lake and great place to run – Seattle should be a model to all other US cities to follow. DKL (Vanc BC)” Next thing you know, housing prices will be up markedly in the vicinity of The Notebook. Someone tell Bernanke that we’ve got a fix for the housing bust. And it is cheap. Seriously, Ben, the gentrifiers are flocking to the notebook, “It’s 1100 AM and our family are returning from the Easter Egg Hunt. Although overcast, its warm and lovely. The kids are eating Easter candy, and we’re going to walk back to the house. I think if there were less distractions I would write more. Great idea this book. Please publish it. Good luck, Fred.”

Even as you enjoy the idyll presented therein, you have to wonder if Fred means that he would write more in the notebook or more generally, like, in life. Which distractions and when?

But anyway, another ode to beauty. The B word was on everyone’s fingers on Friday.
“A beautiful sunset, with a beautiful woman
The water calm and smooth
The air is fresh and clean.
Beautiful—
E + V”

It reminds us of the earliest recorded pitch for Lake Livin'. In 1904, an early Lake tout (not unlike ourself) writing in the Greenlake News, declared that everyone should move to GL to enjoy, “God’s freest gifts: sunshine and clean air.” Perhaps you were not aware that some of God’s gifts are very expensive. It’s all there, in the Bible.

It should be noted that Friday, the 6^th, featured the greatest weather of 2007 while Saturday was warmish, overcast, and a little drizzly. It is not a stretch to say that the Friday crowd was pretty pumped about life while the Saturday people were a bit more restrained in their enthusiasm.

Greta was clearly writing on Saturday when she wrote, “Give me a Big Sun!! And I Love You Leehome. (I miss you so much.)” Apparently, there is love all around you. Check out this sweet little confession, “I’m waiting for my girlfriend to finish up her 3^rd lap around the lake. She’ll run her 1^st ½ marathon in Tacoma in one month. I’m so proud of her.” We’d like to think that the partner in this case is quite fat and possibly asthmatic or a smoker.

Perhaps the most interesting idea to get caught in the trap comes courtesy of Katie.

“Well – I’m Katie—and I’m with Junie—He’s a 14 yr old patient here to cruise chicks in tank tops and pony tails. I’m his nurse & this is the 1^st time I’ve set down to rest & do nothing since 4:30 AM. (It’s 6pm now…) 6 hrs to go on my evening with this young fella. It’s 4/6/07 and 82ºF (crazy global warming…) I’m going to not think now. Signing off for Junie & Katie…
P.S. I’ve got a good man – no cruising for me.
Katie”

That first line is a pretty amazing story, in and of itself. For the weight it carries in hidden pockets, you might compare it to Hemingway’s famous 6 word story, “For sale: baby shoes, never used.” You also like Katie in this paragraph. She comes across. The kind of woman who knows the exact temperature and is outside in it. Call me uncouth, but here’s hoping that Junie got laid or at least smooched.

And while we’re on the topic of sex, or close to it, at least, we got an oldie-but-goodie joke from none other than Ernest Matthews III. “A chicken and an egg are in bed. The chicken [is] smoking a cigarette. The egg pulls the covers over him and says, “I guess we know the answer to that question!”

Then, five or six lines down the page, Ernest wrote “(which came first the chicken or the egg)”. Get it. We appreciate that he left that space, so that if you already got it, you’d just move on but if you were confused, you could read a little further and not get left out with the uninitiated.

But clearly, the risqué comment of the day goes to the author(s)/artist(s) of this doozy:
“[Drawing of a penis with a cape]

Hello. My name is Sir Longfellow, superhero of the planet Cletoris. Anime is my pet peeve and I get really testy around it.

Look for me the next time you spot trouble. Be wary I travel through the black hole & I spit!”

A question: does the chance that you can find the clitoris increase or decrease with the inability to spell it? Just asking. The caped, capering penis will be photographed for your perusal soon by a drunkard raccoon trying hard to stay on the straight-and-narrow. No guarantees on when those pictures will be available.

While we’re on pictures, there was also a drawing of a dog behind a man with trees. The man sort of looked like Paul Bunyan, but the dog bore little resemblance to Babe, the Big Blue Ox.

There was a Harper’s Index which indicated that roughly ½ US office workers think their office is too cold and the other half think it is too hot. Maddie and James N represent the yin-n-yang: “Hi I’m Maddie. It is raining outside and I HATE exercise! This is no fun to be walking! GRR!”. Right next door, “What a great idea and perfect walking weather (rainy and cool, no complaints here!) James N – 4/7/2007”

Shortly thereafter, The Notebook happily received its first non-alphabetic writing. What look to my untrained eye like Chinese characters were posted by Carrie, Doreen, and someone who concluded, “Today is not a beautiful day. It rains and quite hard!! I want sun.” We’ll get our photographer on getting those characters photographed and posted, so that the Internets can translate them.

We also received a note from what I’m guessing is Mother Russia. It said, missing a couple of accents, “Sjedim u hladu, jedem ōokoladu!!! Ermin. Ispod Kruskelezim Pbtrbuske EMER” Any translating fairy/ogligarchs are welcome to take a stab at that one.

A last metanote on the various ways that one can write the date. Just on the 7^th, we got:

April 7, 2007
4.07.07
4//7.
4/7
4/7/2007
We’re never surprised at human variation but who teaches you this?

We want to end this huge post by asking that you turn your hearts and minds to this anonymous fellow traveler. Please think good thoughts for his/her urethra.

“I just got here and I’ve been riding my unicycle all day. My friend said that after goin around greenlake once, she couldn’t use the bathroom for a whole day : ) anyway
Have a good day.
Bye!”